News: Corey Update

Nathan: 00:00:03

This is recovery machine news and hello everybody.

Nathan: 00:00:09

I'm Nathan and we've got Corey over there.

Nathan: 00:00:13

We're gonna do our first.

Nathan: 00:00:15

We're gonna try a different angle here.

Nathan: 00:00:16

We're gonna try a news type presentation.

Nathan: 00:00:20

So we're gonna do a couple stories that are in the news, and then we're gonna

Nathan: 00:00:25

get, Corey's gonna bring us up to date on his, his personal story, as far as

Nathan: 00:00:29

where he is at with, with, uh, his, his work related kind of back and forth.

Nathan: 00:00:36

And we'll see how it works.

Nathan: 00:00:37

I think we'll try to keep it, uh, you know, relatively short and sweet and.

Nathan: 00:00:45

Yeah, I think it'll give us an opportunity to maybe let you know more about, I

Nathan: 00:00:51

mean, if we do a little bit of work, digging things out of the news and

Nathan: 00:00:54

putting together a couple pieces of information that maybe you don't have

Nathan: 00:00:57

time to do, that might be useful for you and it's, uh, useful for us as well,

Nathan: 00:01:02

because it, it kind of makes us keep up to date with what's coming down the pipe.

Nathan: 00:01:07

Yep.

Nathan: 00:01:08

So, yeah.

Nathan: 00:01:09

So Corey, you just, you wrote in Teo, you say.

Nathan: 00:01:13

I was weddings.

Corey: 00:01:14

Yeah.

Corey: 00:01:14

Yep.

Corey: 00:01:15

Out in Teo a wedding.

Corey: 00:01:16

And it was spectacular there for anyone who hasn't been there.

Corey: 00:01:19

It's just one of the most beautiful places on earth.

Corey: 00:01:22

I would, I would venture to say,

Nathan: 00:01:24

yeah.

Nathan: 00:01:25

Yeah.

Nathan: 00:01:25

Even though it was rainy, it was still beautiful.

Nathan: 00:01:28

Absolutely.

Nathan: 00:01:29

All right.

Nathan: 00:01:29

Oh, so, um, the last time I think we talked about this, you wanna

Nathan: 00:01:35

talked about your job situation.

Nathan: 00:01:37

The union was.

Nathan: 00:01:40

Kind of, uh, they, they were wanting you to sort of hang onto the way things

Nathan: 00:01:45

were and sort of see what happened next.

Nathan: 00:01:47

Kind of take a weight and see approach.

Nathan: 00:01:50

And, uh, since then you've had some developments.

Nathan: 00:01:53

Can you tell us what, what transpired and, and what direction

Nathan: 00:01:56

you're, you're headed in here?

Corey: 00:01:59

Yeah.

Corey: 00:01:59

So, so also, you know, when I, when our, uh, the last Corey update episode,

Corey: 00:02:06

uh, it also ended with me declining the position that was offered to me

Corey: 00:02:10

for the accommodation and I, and I, because of my, uh, declining of that

Corey: 00:02:15

offer, I was deemed to have resigned.

Corey: 00:02:18

I was sort of resigned by force if you will, or resigned by, in my opinion, the

Corey: 00:02:23

lack of a, of a more viable option than.

Nathan: 00:02:26

Right.

Nathan: 00:02:27

Even though the option was pretty rough.

Nathan: 00:02:30

Like you, I think you were looking at a, an hour commute either way.

Nathan: 00:02:33

It would be a desk job type situation.

Nathan: 00:02:36

Yeah.

Nathan: 00:02:36

Full-time hours.

Nathan: 00:02:38

Yeah.

Nathan: 00:02:38

Kind of all the things that you were looking to avoid.

Nathan: 00:02:41

You've got the, the younger son.

Nathan: 00:02:42

You don't wanna, you don't want full-time because of that.

Nathan: 00:02:45

And you don't, you certainly don't wanna do two hours worth

Nathan: 00:02:47

commuting a day because of.

Nathan: 00:02:49

Well, who who does, but

Corey: 00:02:51

who, yeah.

Corey: 00:02:52

. Yeah, absolutely.

Corey: 00:02:53

But, but that's, so that was where I was left.

Corey: 00:02:55

But like you said, after that decision was made by me, the decision and the message

Corey: 00:03:01

from, from the union was, you know, let's sort of wait and see what happens

Corey: 00:03:04

next and, uh, uh, keep my practicing license, keep my registration with the

Corey: 00:03:11

union and, um, And just kind of, kind of see, see what see what's out there.

Corey: 00:03:17

However, and, and my, my case has been kind of interesting, cuz the

Corey: 00:03:22

timing has been so critical at, at various points in my story.

Corey: 00:03:26

And uh, the change that was coming in in the next, uh, couple of weeks

Corey: 00:03:30

here was that I was going to have to self pay for my, my monitor.

Corey: 00:03:37

Agreement.

Corey: 00:03:39

And there are for, for our listeners who don't know, there are few, very

Corey: 00:03:44

few employers in our, in our province who are willing to pay for the

Corey: 00:03:49

monitoring for nurses or whoever, the, the safety sensitive professionalism.

Corey: 00:03:55

A lot of employers put the onus back on the, on the

Corey: 00:03:58

individual and it's quite cost.

Nathan: 00:04:01

Yeah, we're talking 600 to a thousand a month.

Nathan: 00:04:03

Something like that, correct?

Nathan: 00:04:04

Yeah.

Nathan: 00:04:05

Correct.

Corey: 00:04:06

So, um, depending on, on what, so if you need, if you need, um, if

Corey: 00:04:11

it's just about urine or blood samples or hair samples, that's one thing if

Corey: 00:04:14

you require, um, like a little sort of at home breathalyzer that you

Corey: 00:04:20

blow into three or four times a day, there's an additional cost there.

Corey: 00:04:23

So it, it, that was not my case, but it becomes very.

Corey: 00:04:27

And so as, as of, you know, in two or three weeks time, I was gonna

Corey: 00:04:30

have to start to self pay for that because I was because I had declined

Corey: 00:04:34

that position that was offered to me.

Corey: 00:04:35

I was no longer attached to that employer.

Corey: 00:04:37

And my union had paid for my monitoring for a year, and

Corey: 00:04:44

now who's gonna pay for it.

Corey: 00:04:47

Worker's compensation does not require the monitoring as a part of their

Corey: 00:04:51

direction or part of their agreement.

Corey: 00:04:54

So it was, it was back onto me to pay.

Corey: 00:04:57

And while I was not working, that was gonna cost me $500 a month.

Corey: 00:05:01

And the understanding was that once I got back to work, that was

Corey: 00:05:04

gonna cost go up to $675 a month.

Corey: 00:05:08

And, and this was if I found a nursing job.

Corey: 00:05:13

And as we got into in our last episode with, with Sheldon Wilson at the stage

Corey: 00:05:19

of, of my career, that I'm at, after being through everything that I've

Corey: 00:05:22

been through, that's not an easy task.

Corey: 00:05:25

To find a nursing, a nursing job, or to find a nursing job with an employer who's

Corey: 00:05:29

willing to pay for, for the monitor.

Corey: 00:05:32

Yeah.

Nathan: 00:05:32

I mean, you could, it's not like there's, I mean, there's lots of

Nathan: 00:05:35

jobs out there, but what the problem is is when you get into these monitoring

Nathan: 00:05:39

contracts, often they start with significant restrictions in what you

Nathan: 00:05:43

are and aren't allowed to do correct.

Nathan: 00:05:46

One of them being, uh, the ability to work in an area where narcotics are being

Nathan: 00:05:50

used or stored, or, uh, like you, you had that one job opportunity and they declined

Nathan: 00:05:56

that just because you would be out in the public where somebody might have.

Nathan: 00:06:01

Drugs.

Nathan: 00:06:02

Yeah.

Nathan: 00:06:02

Which is, you know, that's kind of next level, um, over the top,

Nathan: 00:06:07

it's a little intense, right?

Nathan: 00:06:09

So, and, and restrictive, restrictive.

Corey: 00:06:12

Yeah.

Corey: 00:06:13

And so there's the, there's the actual details of the monitoring, which is

Corey: 00:06:17

submitting urine samples randomly twice a month, logging in to the computer

Corey: 00:06:22

every day to see logging all of the participation in, in, in groups, logging

Corey: 00:06:28

in my counseling, all of that stuff.

Corey: 00:06:30

But then there's also the consent agreement, which is

Corey: 00:06:32

through the governing body.

Corey: 00:06:34

So these things are all restrictive.

Corey: 00:06:36

They, I, I, I don't deny that there's some value to these things to

Corey: 00:06:40

keep, to keep me out of the general vicinity of, of, of a narcotic say.

Corey: 00:06:47

Yeah, that said, that said it, it, it doesn't account for all of

Corey: 00:06:53

the other things that I'm doing.

Corey: 00:06:55

That keep me safe because of myself, you know, like we've talked about before I

Corey: 00:06:59

go to the grocery store now and all of the grocery stores in my community sell

Corey: 00:07:03

wine and I don't go and, and try to take a bottle of wine and, and, and drink it.

Corey: 00:07:09

Like that's, that's my own choice there.

Corey: 00:07:11

Yeah.

Corey: 00:07:11

So, so these things are, um, they are restrictive and they would really.

Corey: 00:07:18

Limit the, the, the possible job directions that I could go within nursing

Corey: 00:07:23

for the next 3, 3, 3 to four years is the usual agreement for, for, for nurses.

Corey: 00:07:28

And mine was, um, a four year agreement.

Nathan: 00:07:32

Hmm.

Nathan: 00:07:32

The rare four year, eh,

Corey: 00:07:35

yeah.

Corey: 00:07:35

So, so my, to, to get to the point, my decision was.

Corey: 00:07:41

Again, particularly after, after some of our more recent discussions

Corey: 00:07:45

and our more recent episodes.

Corey: 00:07:46

And in this last episode with, with Sheldon, and this has been

Corey: 00:07:51

something that I've been mulling over for, well over a year.

Corey: 00:07:55

And in fact, when I think about it a year and a half, you know, I, I, I

Corey: 00:07:58

think of the first two weeks of, of, uh, being off work, I knew that it was

Corey: 00:08:03

coming to this, to the fact that, that I needed to give up my nursing license.

Nathan: 00:08:09

So you, there was a part of you back then that suspected

Nathan: 00:08:13

that your career was over?

Nathan: 00:08:14

Absolutely.

Corey: 00:08:15

Okay.

Corey: 00:08:16

Absolutely.

Corey: 00:08:17

I, and I remember, you know, distinctly having the conversation with my

Corey: 00:08:20

parents, uh, in my living room saying, I, I, I think this is it.

Corey: 00:08:24

Like, I, I, I knew I had a hunch that it was going to be restrictive and

Corey: 00:08:28

that I wouldn't have a lot of, a lot of options, but I also really felt like it.

Corey: 00:08:33

Um, all of the, all of the contributing factors of, of stress and trauma in the

Corey: 00:08:39

workplace and the, the, just the unhealthy nature of the job and, and the things

Corey: 00:08:45

about myself that I wasn't working on.

Corey: 00:08:47

It all kind of came together into this storm.

Corey: 00:08:52

And, and I already was thinking at the very beginning, what

Corey: 00:08:57

would walking back into.

Corey: 00:08:59

Be like for me.

Corey: 00:09:01

So it wasn't a, it was, it was some, but I wanted to be patient with it.

Corey: 00:09:04

I wanted to really mu that over.

Corey: 00:09:06

I wanted to see what the system and what, what, um, what, what,

Corey: 00:09:11

how I could kind of navigate that.

Corey: 00:09:13

And if there was gonna be some doors that were still open, as you

Corey: 00:09:17

know, in the last update of, of mine, There were no doors open.

Nathan: 00:09:21

Well, um, , I will say that I've, I've never seen anybody get into this

Nathan: 00:09:29

situation and navigate it with such.

Nathan: 00:09:34

Clarity and, and such a rational, healthy approach.

Nathan: 00:09:41

There were times where you were very, very frustrated in those disciplinary meetings.

Nathan: 00:09:45

Uh, those are couldn't get really kind of heated and weird mm-hmm and

Nathan: 00:09:51

I think both of yours definitely were mm-hmm and I think a lot of people.

Nathan: 00:09:59

Would've reacted differently.

Nathan: 00:10:01

Most people, I believe would've reacted differently based on what I've seen.

Nathan: 00:10:05

I mean, you were, you were really in against somebody there who, for

Nathan: 00:10:09

whatever reason, many times it's, uh, if you look deeper into these

Nathan: 00:10:12

people's paths who have these people who it's almost like they have, uh,

Nathan: 00:10:16

a willingness to be ignorant about.

Nathan: 00:10:19

The condition of having, uh, you know, suffering from any

Nathan: 00:10:22

kind of addictive behavior.

Nathan: 00:10:23

Mm-hmm and if you look, I, I bet you, if you looked at that individual's past,

Nathan: 00:10:27

he's probably lost a family member.

Nathan: 00:10:31

Maybe could be some, could be his dad even, or somebody close

Nathan: 00:10:34

to him was affected by it.

Nathan: 00:10:37

I've seen that where people get angry and then instead of.

Nathan: 00:10:41

Looking deeper into the problem.

Nathan: 00:10:43

They shut down and put up a kind of shield.

Nathan: 00:10:45

And whenever they see it, they look to snap it out.

Nathan: 00:10:48

Right?

Nathan: 00:10:48

Yeah.

Nathan: 00:10:49

And that, that kind of, from what I was seeing, and I was paying

Nathan: 00:10:54

quite a bit attention to your back and forth and stuff like that, I

Nathan: 00:10:56

really looked like this individual.

Nathan: 00:10:58

Was it just making things more difficult than they had

Nathan: 00:11:02

to be for no apparent reason?

Nathan: 00:11:04

And that's, this is what happens, you know?

Nathan: 00:11:06

It, it, it, you run into these people.

Nathan: 00:11:07

Some people are very.

Nathan: 00:11:10

Empathetic.

Nathan: 00:11:11

They want to try their best to make things easier.

Nathan: 00:11:13

Others don't just the way it is, the way you handled that situation

Nathan: 00:11:17

was, was pretty remarkable.

Nathan: 00:11:19

And I think there was an opportunity even after where you could have.

Nathan: 00:11:26

You could have fought harder if you wanted to, and you absolutely.

Nathan: 00:11:29

You could have won like, uh, I, I have no doubt that if you wanted to,

Nathan: 00:11:35

you could have taken them right to the end and, and beat them that way.

Nathan: 00:11:39

But you didn't because you were wise enough to see that at that point,

Nathan: 00:11:44

you, you, weren't just saying that you were putting a recovery first

Nathan: 00:11:48

and all that kind of nonsense.

Nathan: 00:11:49

You actually understood what it meant.

Nathan: 00:11:52

And how much more your per your, uh, emotional mental health would mean

Nathan: 00:11:57

to you personally, and those who rely on you, like your son and your,

Nathan: 00:12:02

your parents and significantly other

Corey: 00:12:04

yeah.

Corey: 00:12:04

You know, like, I, I think.

Corey: 00:12:08

First of all.

Corey: 00:12:08

Thank you.

Corey: 00:12:09

I think that I had worked too hard to not pay attention to the lessons that I

Corey: 00:12:15

had learned and I, and if I had have I, for me and I, and I admire the people who

Corey: 00:12:21

persevere and then do get back to work and, and if it's able to work for them,

Corey: 00:12:25

um, I, you know, I don't want to say that this is the only way to go, because I

Corey: 00:12:30

really believe that you and I have done a, I think we've done a good job of, of

Corey: 00:12:33

trying to portray the fact that there are.

Corey: 00:12:36

Many different roads to take.

Corey: 00:12:39

Yeah.

Corey: 00:12:39

But it is such a, it's such a personal thing.

Corey: 00:12:41

And for me, like asking myself, how does this really work for me?

Corey: 00:12:46

Or how does this work for my recovery, but how does it really, how does

Corey: 00:12:50

this piece of information sit or how does this potential decision sit?

Corey: 00:12:54

And so when I came to the fact that, okay, now, At the end here I'm, I'm now

Corey: 00:12:59

gonna have to pay for my own monitoring.

Corey: 00:13:00

I'm gonna be paying $675 a month, uh, to be restricted in, in the areas I can work

Corey: 00:13:09

to potentially not even be able to work with people anymore, which I really in,

Corey: 00:13:13

in thinking about my career in nursing, the thing that I kept coming back to.

Corey: 00:13:19

That was the most at times a very stressful part of the job, but it was

Corey: 00:13:22

also the most redeeming part of the job was like that human interaction of,

Corey: 00:13:26

of reaching people and meeting people where they were at and helping to, to

Corey: 00:13:32

make people feel better or build them up or what, you know, whatever it may be.

Corey: 00:13:35

That was the redeeming part of the job.

Corey: 00:13:37

So to be sitting behind a desk at a computer, uh, not having human

Corey: 00:13:41

contact, uh, having to pay for my own.

Corey: 00:13:45

Monitoring that that was the choice of the governing body and an addictions

Corey: 00:13:50

doctor that didn't, that didn't sit with me and that there was no

Corey: 00:13:53

autonomy in that there was no like sort of personal agency in that.

Corey: 00:13:58

And, and so it just became clearer and clearer and clearer.

Corey: 00:14:02

And, um, but you kind of then have to take, there's a, a leap

Corey: 00:14:06

that has to be done in that where you have to like, actually take a

Corey: 00:14:10

deep breath in and make that move.

Corey: 00:14:11

And that is a scary part of, of the process.

Nathan: 00:14:15

It is a lot harder to do it than to say it.

Nathan: 00:14:20

And, uh, I've done these, you know, I've made a couple big leaps of faith in my, in

Nathan: 00:14:26

my life where there was a lot on the line.

Nathan: 00:14:29

I had no idea how it was gonna turn out and I made it through just by she luck

Nathan: 00:14:35

or, you know, whatever good fortune.

Nathan: 00:14:37

But I think with your career in, in particular, it's.

Nathan: 00:14:45

People are up against two things.

Nathan: 00:14:47

They get complacent depending on how long they've been in their

Nathan: 00:14:51

whatever particular profession.

Nathan: 00:14:54

And it's almost like, you know, when you, you get, uh, I dunno if you're

Nathan: 00:14:58

into investing at all, but some people, a trap that you can get in when you're

Nathan: 00:15:02

investing is you, you put a lot of time and effort in a stock and you're you.

Nathan: 00:15:08

Money in you take money out every time you interact with that stock,

Nathan: 00:15:12

you're actually building its value up in your mind in a way that is not

Nathan: 00:15:16

in line with what it's really worth.

Nathan: 00:15:18

Right.

Nathan: 00:15:18

If you know what I mean, it's time invested.

Nathan: 00:15:20

So you're not just, you're not just quitting your job.

Nathan: 00:15:23

You're like, oh, you know, I put in all those ti all this time in school.

Nathan: 00:15:27

What about all this?

Nathan: 00:15:28

And so that's the, that one factor then there's the identity factor.

Nathan: 00:15:33

You know?

Nathan: 00:15:33

Yep.

Nathan: 00:15:33

Are you strong enough to just say, look, I'm more than this.

Nathan: 00:15:37

I'm not just a healthcare professional.

Nathan: 00:15:39

I can go do whatever the hell I want.

Nathan: 00:15:42

You know, those are rational thoughts, but it's hard for people

Nathan: 00:15:45

to like, I I've tried I've I've used half measures basically, and I've,

Nathan: 00:15:51

I've kind of tapered my pharmacy.

Nathan: 00:15:54

down to what I could stand, but I don't, man.

Nathan: 00:15:58

I, I admire you just, you saw the writing on the wall.

Nathan: 00:16:02

And honestly, I think it's, we've talked about this before the danger

Nathan: 00:16:06

of going back into that place, you know, if you're, when you're monitored.

Nathan: 00:16:11

Okay.

Nathan: 00:16:12

That's very helpful.

Nathan: 00:16:13

You know, maybe you're on Suboxone, they're starting to

Nathan: 00:16:15

allow that that's also helpful.

Nathan: 00:16:17

Yep.

Nathan: 00:16:17

But man, it doesn't mean that you're safe forever and it's just, it is

Nathan: 00:16:23

a very dangerous, especially right now, a dangerous place to work.

Nathan: 00:16:28

And it's really hard on.

Nathan: 00:16:30

Mental health as well, even if it is, you're doing everything right.

Corey: 00:16:33

It, it is.

Corey: 00:16:34

And you know, I, I think that going back to that piece about identity,

Corey: 00:16:39

Regardless of, of what the profession is.

Corey: 00:16:42

Nursing is certainly one that has there.

Corey: 00:16:44

There's a lot of that.

Corey: 00:16:45

There's a lot of personal identity that becomes attached to that, where

Corey: 00:16:49

it, it runs into every facet of, of your, of your life, where people.

Corey: 00:16:55

People and loved ones and anyone who knows that you're a nurse or a

Corey: 00:16:58

healthcare profession will, will ask you questions or run things by you.

Corey: 00:17:01

And, and, uh, and there's pride in that and there's identity in that,

Corey: 00:17:06

but there's a, the, to me, the, like the actual danger of the identity

Corey: 00:17:09

being attached to that is that.

Corey: 00:17:13

That self-esteem and self-worth is attached to that and this whole thing.

Corey: 00:17:18

And even if even staying in it, even if I were to, to suck it up and do a

Corey: 00:17:22

desk job and to do something that an avenue of nursing, that was not my, not

Corey: 00:17:27

my truth, not my passion or my interest even, but if it was like just saying,

Corey: 00:17:31

okay, well, at least I'm, I'm still, I'm still this, I'm still this nurse.

Corey: 00:17:35

And then I get through it that four years of monitoring.

Corey: 00:17:38

And that four years of being under sort of under the thumb of this,

Corey: 00:17:41

of the, of the recovery machine, there's a toll that, that takes on

Corey: 00:17:46

our self-esteem and on our self worth.

Corey: 00:17:48

And every, you know, and I've heard this from other other professionals,

Corey: 00:17:52

and I'm sure you have two Nathan where, where, and Ken Ross said the

Corey: 00:17:56

same thing in our interview with her, that the monitoring was almost

Corey: 00:17:59

harmful and it kind of keeps you down.

Corey: 00:18:01

It, it kind of has a, has an ability to rub your nose in it.

Corey: 00:18:06

And.

Corey: 00:18:08

Recovery should be about building, building ourselves up

Corey: 00:18:10

and holding ourselves up with what we've learned, ideally.

Corey: 00:18:14

And that.

Corey: 00:18:15

Keeping us down I think is, is harmful.

Corey: 00:18:18

No, again, not, I know that for, for some, it, it, it works and

Corey: 00:18:21

they've, and it's effective, but there's, that had to be weighed out

Nathan: 00:18:25

for me.

Nathan: 00:18:26

Absolutely.

Nathan: 00:18:27

And yeah, of course it takes a toll and depending on the person, they're, they're

Nathan: 00:18:32

either gonna accept that as part of, uh, part of the deal and, you know, chalk

Nathan: 00:18:36

it up as a negative, but oh, you know?

Nathan: 00:18:37

Okay.

Nathan: 00:18:39

You get used to it by the end of it, you know, it's not such a big deal,

Nathan: 00:18:42

but I think it depends on how much, uh, how much you have yourself propped up.

Nathan: 00:18:47

Right?

Nathan: 00:18:48

If your yeah.

Nathan: 00:18:49

Identity is propped up by a lot of these, uh, external, um, like

Nathan: 00:18:54

your career, whatever, what, uh, how many letters you have behind

Nathan: 00:18:57

your name, these types of thing.

Nathan: 00:19:00

To me, all that is, has always been nonsense.

Nathan: 00:19:03

I don't understand how, how people equate, um, I mean of sure they

Nathan: 00:19:09

can equate academic excellence or a skill in a, a specific field.

Nathan: 00:19:14

And that's really cool.

Nathan: 00:19:15

Yep.

Nathan: 00:19:15

But it's not, it's not all what you are it.

Nathan: 00:19:19

I mean, there's just, there's so many facets of being a human being and to put

Nathan: 00:19:22

everything into that, uh, whatever field you're in and then have your entire world.

Nathan: 00:19:28

You know, sitting on this precipice, waiting yeah.

Nathan: 00:19:32

Waiting for somebody to kick the leg out.

Nathan: 00:19:34

I, I don't know.

Nathan: 00:19:34

I, I, I understand why people have a problem with it, for sure.

Nathan: 00:19:38

But, um, luckily I think in my case, it wasn't that part

Nathan: 00:19:43

wasn't as big of an issue.

Nathan: 00:19:45

There was, there's actually no way I was going back without, uh, monitoring,

Nathan: 00:19:48

I think is the only redeeming.

Nathan: 00:19:51

Uh, it's the only thing of value, but of course it could be done

Nathan: 00:19:54

way cheaper and way, uh, for sure.

Nathan: 00:19:57

I mean, there, it doesn't have to be as ridiculous as it is,

Nathan: 00:20:01

and there's a way to do it.

Nathan: 00:20:02

I believe that doesn't require you to have your face.

Nathan: 00:20:06

Smushed in your mess over?

Nathan: 00:20:08

I think so too.

Nathan: 00:20:09

I think so too.

Nathan: 00:20:10

We have the technology, like, uh, it's, it's a shame, but I, you know, I, I

Nathan: 00:20:17

see a lot of positives, uh, in the future and hopefully we'll get there.

Corey: 00:20:22

Absolutely.

Corey: 00:20:22

You know, and just the last thing I was gonna say, going

Corey: 00:20:25

back to identity quickly is that.

Corey: 00:20:28

For me like to, to actually think about the parts of my personality and

Corey: 00:20:33

my nature that made me a good nurse.

Corey: 00:20:37

Those things are still there.

Corey: 00:20:38

If I'm not a nurse.

Corey: 00:20:40

And I would venture to all of our listeners who are, who are struggling with

Corey: 00:20:44

that to like, think about what your, what those good qualities you have are that

Corey: 00:20:49

made you a good nurse, your compassion, your, your listening skills, your

Corey: 00:20:54

ingenuity, you know, your intellect, your resourcefulness, whatever those qualities

Corey: 00:21:00

are, those aren't bound to nursing or whatever the other profession is.

Corey: 00:21:06

Those are, those are qualities that exist within us as human beings.

Nathan: 00:21:11

Yeah.

Nathan: 00:21:11

And, and let's be real.

Nathan: 00:21:12

I mean, the way things are going in the world now.

Nathan: 00:21:16

And, uh, I remember being warned about this when I was younger, but it.

Nathan: 00:21:20

It's not the same anymore, where you, you go into profession and expect to

Nathan: 00:21:25

practice that for X amount of years.

Nathan: 00:21:27

I mean, it hasn't been like that for a long time, right?

Nathan: 00:21:29

No, you're still getting baby boomers are kind of, they'll be the last ones

Nathan: 00:21:33

who kind of finished with that system.

Nathan: 00:21:35

And I think it'll be.

Nathan: 00:21:37

I mean, I can't tell you how many D I've had many different jobs, even at pharmacy

Nathan: 00:21:41

I've I I've worked all over the place.

Nathan: 00:21:43

Like I, I never am in one place for like two, two and a

Nathan: 00:21:47

half years, usually maximum.

Nathan: 00:21:49

Yeah.

Nathan: 00:21:50

And I just don't given the job market.

Nathan: 00:21:54

And I think if you, if you have the desire to learn right now and, and

Nathan: 00:22:00

you want to try something new, uh, that is definitely in your favor.

Nathan: 00:22:05

It's probably the best time of, of my life for, for trying something new.

Nathan: 00:22:10

So, oh yeah.

Nathan: 00:22:10

Same.

Nathan: 00:22:12

So that's a good thing.

Corey: 00:22:13

Yeah.

Corey: 00:22:14

So food for thought there that, you know, again, there are different ways

Corey: 00:22:17

to do it for, for me after a year and a half of everything I've been through

Corey: 00:22:23

and being through the machine and kind of being spit out the other side of it.

Corey: 00:22:27

And.

Corey: 00:22:28

A lot of stress, a lot of, a lot of anxiety and worry and uncertainty.

Corey: 00:22:34

This is where I came to.

Corey: 00:22:36

And, uh, and I, you know, again, and I've talked about this before, too,

Corey: 00:22:40

that it's always so telling to me how I feel when I pay attention to

Corey: 00:22:44

how I feel during these decisions.

Corey: 00:22:46

Like, what does my body feel like as I'm, as I'm making whatever decision or saying,

Corey: 00:22:50

whatever it is that I'm gonna gonna say.

Corey: 00:22:53

As I, you know, fired off these multiple emails and I had to, you know, send

Corey: 00:22:58

several emails of confirmation to various parties at play here that this

Corey: 00:23:02

was my actual decision and that I was saying this not under GS and that it

Corey: 00:23:06

was all on the up and up that I was wanting to, to give up my license.

Corey: 00:23:10

I finished it and I.

Corey: 00:23:12

I felt really, really good.

Corey: 00:23:14

And I woke up the next morning and that was the first morning.

Corey: 00:23:16

I hadn't didn't have to log in and do the monitoring.

Corey: 00:23:19

And I thought, no, this, this makes sense.

Corey: 00:23:22

Yeah.

Corey: 00:23:22

This makes sense for me right now.

Nathan: 00:23:24

I completely agree.

Nathan: 00:23:26

And I.

Nathan: 00:23:27

We've talked about how it's easier to see other people's problems and you,

Nathan: 00:23:30

you've got a different perspective when you're not that person and

Nathan: 00:23:33

everything, but, and I don't think you could have done anything better.

Nathan: 00:23:36

Like it, it's, it's a rare thing to see.

Nathan: 00:23:39

And I, I do agree with you that it's, it's the right decision.

Nathan: 00:23:44

And when you, so how does that work?

Nathan: 00:23:48

You, you.

Nathan: 00:23:49

You basically emailed a bunch of people.

Nathan: 00:23:51

That's how you dispersed that information, correct?

Corey: 00:23:54

I, I, uh, yeah.

Nathan: 00:23:56

Did you get some interesting responses?

Nathan: 00:23:58

I did.

Corey: 00:23:59

Yeah, I, I did.

Corey: 00:24:00

So I, I, uh, in terms of the monitoring company, I got a very kind supportive

Corey: 00:24:06

statement back, uh, from the union.

Corey: 00:24:09

Very much the same.

Corey: 00:24:10

Mm-hmm they, they kind of really wanted me to say, no, this is my decision.

Corey: 00:24:13

I stand by.

Corey: 00:24:14

This is what I wanna do.

Corey: 00:24:16

yeah, I think, I think that the particular person I had been interacting

Corey: 00:24:19

with knew that I was heading that way.

Corey: 00:24:20

She was the person I had been interacting with several months prior.

Corey: 00:24:24

And, and, uh, so in that last episode I mentioned her that she was.

Corey: 00:24:28

She was aware that I was kind of at the end of the end of the road and

Corey: 00:24:32

from my governing body, I had to send two emails before I got a response.

Corey: 00:24:39

And then the response, uh, was worded was D the response was directed to my union.

Corey: 00:24:47

Referring to me as Mr.

Corey: 00:24:49

Williams, it was not even responding to me directly.

Corey: 00:24:53

And, um, I thought, you know, , to me that really summed it up.

Corey: 00:24:58

Like I like I've, I've sent two emails telling you what I'm doing.

Corey: 00:25:01

And the response went to the union about me and what, what it would look like

Corey: 00:25:06

for me, if I ever wanted to come back.

Nathan: 00:25:08

Yeah.

Nathan: 00:25:08

How much more mechanical how less, I mean that there's no humanity there whatsoever.

Corey: 00:25:16

Right.

Corey: 00:25:16

And I, I like, and I, and I left it, I left it at that, but I thought I

Corey: 00:25:20

just, I sent you two emails by name and, and I get a response that went,

Corey: 00:25:27

you know, directed at someone else.

Corey: 00:25:29

It's like, if you asked me a question and I looked, you know, over there to.

Corey: 00:25:34

Tell the tree in my, in my yard, the answer like it was, it, it just doesn't

Corey: 00:25:38

make sense to me, but it was, it was very, it felt emblematic of, of how I have

Corey: 00:25:43

felt at different points in this process.

Corey: 00:25:45

And, uh, so I kind of chuckled and, and let it go.

Nathan: 00:25:52

Yeah.

Nathan: 00:25:54

And, uh, you've mentioned a couple things about where, what you're, you're leaning

Nathan: 00:25:58

towards as far as, uh, possible options.

Nathan: 00:26:01

Do you wanna give us kind of an idea of what you're thinking?

Corey: 00:26:04

Uh, I still have, there's still so much that's, um, up in the air for

Corey: 00:26:08

me, but for, for the immediate, I, I would love to continue to work with,

Corey: 00:26:12

with people and, um, And with youth or with people who are struggling.

Corey: 00:26:18

Um, so there are, there's an abundance of jobs within the community services,

Corey: 00:26:22

nonprofit sector right now that interest me that I've got some, some,

Corey: 00:26:27

um, interviews and, and leads on.

Corey: 00:26:30

So I hope to follow that and, um, and then probably will up my education at

Corey: 00:26:36

some point and do some things to, to.

Corey: 00:26:39

You know, sort of add to my resume and add to my experience and value and, and yeah.

Nathan: 00:26:46

Yeah.

Nathan: 00:26:46

You're not gonna last long for somebody grabs you and gets you

Nathan: 00:26:50

involved in something it's gonna be pretty interesting to watch.

Nathan: 00:26:53

And, uh, yeah, I have no doubt that, uh, it's gonna go well for you,

Nathan: 00:26:57

but yeah, that's awesome, Matt.

Nathan: 00:26:58

I, I just, uh, I'm so glad that, uh, I was able to be, you know, a

Nathan: 00:27:03

part of this, part of your story to, to kinda watch it unfold and.

Nathan: 00:27:08

And, uh, cuz there was a, I mean it was, I've seen some weird ones for sure.

Nathan: 00:27:13

And uh, that one was up there really bizarre twists and yeah, very interesting.

Nathan: 00:27:22

Um, so yeah, but, uh, so that's where Corey's at.

Nathan: 00:27:26

We'll leave it at that for now.

Corey: 00:27:29

Yeah, until the, until the next query update until the next

Nathan: 00:27:32

update.

Nathan: 00:27:32

Yeah.

Nathan: 00:27:33

Who knows what?

Nathan: 00:27:34

Yep.